Ephesians 5:22-33 The
text for our meditation on God’s Holy Word is the epistle lesson chosen for
this day. Dear brothers and sisters in
Christ, and especially you, David and Becky, I bring you grace mercy and peace
from God our Father and from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.
Of all of the blessings and tender
mercies that our gracious heavenly Father bestows upon us to enrich our earthly
lives, surely the blessing of marriage comes first, for from it comes life
itself.
When God formed Adam from the dust
of the earth and breathed into him the breath of life, the first blessing that
he bestowed upon him was the blessing of a helper fit for him. When Adam saw the woman God had created for
him, Adam said: This at last is bone of
my bone and flesh of my flesh. God grant that you always feel that way about
the other!
This
one-flesh relationship between one man and one woman was God’s institution of
marriage, the very estate that you are entering into today.
Marriage
is God’s good gift. He is the one who
says what marriage is. No matter what
our godless culture says about marriage—no matter what laws are enacted by the
state—marriage itself can never be re-interpreted or re-defined because it is
not man’s invention but God’s gift: one
man—one woman—united together in a one-flesh relationship that is intended by
God to last a life-time.
And just as the gift itself has
never changed, neither have the purposes of marriage for which God created
it: first of all, the gift of children.
The
fruitfulness of marriage in the pro-creation of children is an enduring sign
that we are made in the image of God for the love between a man and a woman
brings forth life, reflecting the love of God that created life and continues
to give life.
Along
with the gift of children, marriage blesses us with a companion and helper for
life’s journey and the only God-pleasing way to enjoy God’s good gift of
sexuality.
But
there is another purpose for marriage besides these gifts that benefit the
husband and wife—there is a purpose for marriage that is intended by God to
serve the world.
Christian
marriage was designed by God so that it would bear witness to the world as to
the relationship that exists between Christ and the church. Your marriage is not intended by God to serve
only your earthly needs-- but is intended to serve the spiritual needs of those
around you as they see in your marriage something of the love and respect that
exists between Christ and the church.
Each
of you has a part to play in that sacred vocation. The Apostle Paul says that the husband is to
love his wife like Christ loves the church and the wife is to respect her
husband as the church submits to Christ and in these ways each of you are to
submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. The point is this:
This
life that you are called to lead as husband and wife (and how each of you
should behave towards the other) does not come first of all from your
relationship with one another-- but from your relationship with Christ. He is the only one who can help you to
fulfill the high calling that you are entering into today.
David
you are called to love Becky like Christ loves the church, putting her first,
laying down your very life for her if need be—but always sacrificing yourself
to meet her needs.
The
relationship between Christ and the church begins with the love of Christ and
so your marriage relationship begins when you love Becky in a Christ-like way.
Becky
you are called to respect David as the Church honors Christ and to submit to
him in everything.
This
is a very different model for marriage than what the world offers. TV shows and women’s magazines and
relationship “experts” tell us ad nauseum
that marriage is 50-50, that we have to insist on getting what we want—that we
have to make sure that our needs are met.
Holy
Scripture says that we are to look to Jesus Christ, see the love and sacrifice
he has for us, and then live out that same love and sacrifice when it comes to
our relationship with our spouse.
Obviously,
this kind of married life that always puts the other first is a particular
blessing for the two people who are married to one another. But it has a higher calling as well that
extends far beyond just those two people.
As
Christian couples live out these kinds of lives in their marriage they put
flesh and bone on the relationship that exists between Christ and the Church
and they bear witness to those around them as to the love that God has for the
world.
And
just as that love that God has for the world is enduring, so the marital life
of one husband and one wife is to endure.
Divorce
is not permitted except where adultery has already broken that one flesh
relationship and so the promises you make today to God and one another in the
presence of this congregation and in God’s sight are intended to last a life
time.
We
make very few promises to do something for the rest of our life but you are
making one today.
Your
ability to keep that promise will not be found in the strength of your
commitment or in the fervency of your love for one another. It will be found in the love that Christ has
for you.
He
is the one who will speak to your heart through his Word. He is the One who will forgive your sins in
Holy Absolution. He is the One who will
feed you with his own life in Holy Communion to strengthen your life of love.
Receiving
these gifts of Christ’s love, your own love for one another will be renewed and
strengthened throughout your married life as you forgive one another as Christ
forgave you.
Beginning
each day in God’s grace will help you let the past be past when it comes to
sorrows and failures that most surely come when two people live out a life
together in marriage.
As
your relationship with Christ is strengthened and sustained through God’s gifts
of Word and sacrament, so will your marriage grow stronger and become a more
powerful testimony to the love that exists between Christ and his church.
To
this holy end I pray that God would richly bless your life together as husband
and wife!
And
now may the peace of God that passes all understanding keep your hearts and
minds in Christ Jesus unto life everlasting.
Amen.
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